All through my day to day activities I encounter people who are still doing things the same way. No change or even a remote attempt at change. This got me to wondering, why am I so eager for a change in me?
Maya Angelou once said, “I did then what I knew how to do. Now that I know better, I do better.” This is such a prolific statement. Knowing some other way that is better than the way we’re accustomed to should at least make us want to try it, right?
Everyone is not the same, but knowing and understanding who you are is a part of self-love. At the bare minimum, everyone does that (wink wink). Not pointing fingers, this post is about me as much as someone else, so I am the preacher and the choir. And because it’s for me, I should say that I’m looking for change and growth in myself. I intend to define myself for myself.
Perfect progress is slow and steady. For me to become who I envision myself to be, I gotta take baby steps. I’m also a little antsy, so I need as small amount of steps as possible. With that in mind, I’ve come up with six steps to help me begin to define myself for myself.
For me, without God, I am nothing. In 2016 I found that I got away from daily bible reading and quite honestly my life suffered in many ways. My belief, is that my identity begins and ends in Christ, without him my definition would be incomplete.
Who am I? What do I really want in life? Why do I like Keyshia Cole better than Jill Scott? Why don’t I care for bootleg movies, even though I’m frugal? Knowing why I am who I am will help me reach the next level in my self-improvement.
Telling myself the truth
Being honest about myself is the only way for me to make real changes. I gotta get down in the crevices of my psyche to understand why I always say I want to save money, but desire and buy three or four Coach bags a year! Going deep with myself will expose my rawness and also help me deal with my inner issues, so I can be a better me.
Knowing and Understanding Where I come from
I am African American woman and just being this race and gender can create hurdles in how I am perceived and accepted. I must take the time to read and learn about my ancestors, to know where I come from. Everyone should do this no matter what race and gender that you are. Learning of your origin can create deep pride in your being and also let you know you can change and be whoever you want to be.
Let’s face it, day to day life is fast and hectic, and I find myself making list about everything, so why not make a list about changes I want to make for the betterment of me? What hobbies have I not tried yet? I can create a bucket list and scratch one item off at a time. What I know for sure is that most of the things I want to be and do are in reach. I just gotta make the time and be willing to go for it!
What am I here for? How can I be of service to others? Defining myself opens me up to so many different avenues that will give me the courage to step into my true calling. Gaining clarity in my life will position me to develop purpose.
As with all things, this list is a work in progress, but it’s a great place for me to start. With practice, perseverance, and my lists (hehehee), I’ll be closer to my definition of me in no time.